I cockslap morals
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Randomize
