do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
