i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
