rhymes with "ouble enetration"
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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