he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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