you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
