Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
