the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
