no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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