You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
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