If i come over, it means nothing
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize