How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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