good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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