Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
