I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
