I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
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