Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
