We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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