So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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