Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
