I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
