woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
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