so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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