just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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