You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
