Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
