Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
