; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
i now understand why vodka
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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