remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
