I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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