but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Randomize
