how hairy? two words: wookie tits
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
