she was so not down for the gang bang
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
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