Your dad touched me again.
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Randomize
