What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
A bitchslap is in order.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
