so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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