Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize