My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
