wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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