Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
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