Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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