Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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