I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
he was CRYING into my vagina
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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