And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
FUCK WHALES
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