you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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