Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Randomize
