its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
