I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
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