I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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