I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
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