I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize